No one cares what you have to say.
Nothing you say will actually help someone.
No one cares about what you’re trying to build.
Those sentences above are all very real thoughts that have gone through my head this week. As you can imagine, they are not helpful. But they did create results—just not the ones I really wanted. The result they produced was hours staring at my computer agonizing over what I could say to help someone and/or help build my business. If my two main goals are to help people and build a business, can you see how those thoughts don’t get me any closer?
If you’ve been following me for a while, you know that I teach that our thoughts create our feelings, which drive our actions and give us our results. So let’s look at the emotions that come to mind when I think those thoughts listed above: small, insufficient, inadequate, failure.
What actions did I take from those emotions? Judge myself (harshly), ruminate on not being smart enough, stare at the computer, not stick to my calendar, don’t create content or provide value, etc.
So here I am on Saturday morning staring at a blank screen trying to figure out what to write for the blog this week. I could easily continue to follow the same pattern as above—same thoughts, same emotions, same actions, same result. And to be completely transparent, for a little bit, I did repeat that pattern. But then I started thinking about the other results I created this week.
This is where things got interesting.
My list of results was WAY MORE than I originally thought:
– Posted three out of five weekdays.
– Created and scheduled weekend posts.
– Recorded four interviews for upcoming podcasts.
– Had 10 coaching sessions this week.
– Interviewed for a coaching contract position.
– Received confirmation that I received the contract position.
– Got exclusive invite to join an 8-week coaching intensive.
– Booked a consult for next week.
– Scheduled two coffee dates (one with a new friend, and one with an old friend).
– Participated in three networking events.
To me, that’s an impressive list—especially given the thoughts I mentioned at the beginning of this post. If those are the results I can create with a messy mind, imagine what I can create when I clean my thoughts up! Just as we evaluated the above thoughts, emotions, actions, and results of my unintentional model, it’s important that we evaluate the positive results so we can recreate them—even when we have a messy mind.
The results are listed above, so what are the actions I took to get those results? What emotions did I have to feel in order to take those actions? And what thoughts did I have that created the emotions? We could recreate models for each one of the results, but for sake of time I’ll talk about it from a higher perspective.
Some of the thoughts that created those results were: All I need to do is show up, I already know I’m an amazing coach so now I’m just learning the sales and marketing side, I keep my commitments, etc. Those thoughts generated emotions like relief, confidence, and peace. Those emotions drove me to take actions like commenting on social media, responding to messages, studying/getting educated, coaching, and even evaluating results.
I share this from a place of vulnerability because I want to give you a sneak peek into my mind. I have plenty of fears about posting this and how it could damage my credibility, etc. But at the end of the day, this is my experience. This is the HUMAN EXERPIENCE. Posting this is proof of coaching—including my own self-coaching! Don’t let discomfort stop you from doing something. You’re going to feel discomfort anyway so you may as well make that discomfort part of forward plan rather than the reason to hold you back.
Coaching has had an amazing impact on my life and this post along with the results I created this past week are proof of that. If you are stressed, anxious, overwhelmed, or languishing in the rinse and repeat of life, please reach out to me because I can help. No, I won’t and can’t make you feel good all the time; however, I can help you gain deeper understanding, higher perspective, and help you rediscover the excitement that you have been missing.
Happy Independence Day to my friends in the USA and I’ll see you in your inbox next week 😊
Feel Bad & Get Sh!t Done
No one cares what you have to say.