It’s about YOU and your happiness, let them worry about their own

Why is setting boundaries so hard?

There are a few common reasons:

  • Protecting Others
    • We take on other people’s emotions. We empathize or sympathize. We try to protect them from discomfort.
      • Aka People-Pleasing 
  • Fear of Rejection 
    • If they don’t like what I say, they’ll hate me/no longer be in my life. They’ll view me differently. 
      • Aka People-Pleasing 
      • Aka Perfectionism 
The REAL reasons we don’t set boundaries:
  • Our own discomfort
    • We avoid setting boundaries because it makes us feel uncomfortable. We don’t tell people about our boundaries so we just distance ourselves or live in misery. Both feel miserable!
  • We don’t know how
    • We don’t know or fully understand the structure to set a boundary (and yes, there is a structure).

If every time you wanted to set a boundary, it feels like an ultimatum, you’ve made it about them and how they should change to make you feel better. YOUR boundary is not about them, it’s about YOU.

Each time you set a boundary about them, you’ll be re-traumatized when they don’t change.

When we properly set boundaries, we’re free to be authentic without walking on eggshells. We protect our own peace instead of trying to change others. Some people won’t like the boundary you set–and that’s okay. Our relationships grow and evolve–and sometimes, it can mean the relationship is at its end. This is okay.

Boundaries promote honesty, trust, vulnerability, and communication. Do those sound familiar? They should because look at any relationship expert’s material and you’ll find those characteristics listed.

Boundaries are important but we don’t set nearly enough as we should.

If you need help learning how to set boundaries so you can protect your own peace; design the life you actually want to live; and build authentic relationships; I invite you to join me in my 6-month 1:1 personal coaching container. This is where the focus is solely on you and what you want to achieve with individualized support.

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Where Emotions Come From & How to Create Awareness

Knowing where emotions come from and how they are created, opens you up to create MAGIC. Gain more control over your emotions and learn to create any emotion at any time.

Relationship with yourself and Your future

When you build a relationship with your future, it makes the present SO MUCH EASIER! Tapping into your future self is the key to creating clarity and ease in your life RIGHT NOW.

Living life without a buffer

Buffering is the way we avoid feeling terrible. It’s the reason you don’t have all the things we want. Learning to live without buffering is a powerful tool that sets you free from all the things holding you back.

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